Resurrecting Dirty Den... again Poor Dirty Den. He went to all that trouble to remove the bullet from his chest, clamber out of the canal, put on a new suit and trudge back to Walford (and let's face it, if it took 14 years to do that, it must have been serious. Give the man a break.). And how was he repayed for this grand gesture? Why, he was brutally beaten over the head by not one... but two ugly ladies. Smashing! We at timhalbert.com feel slightly cheated by the death of Den Watts. He had his moments, didn't he? Who could possibly forget the infamous scene from May 2004 in which Den Watts stood in the corner looking really bored? Or how about that unforgettable moment in November 2004 when Den Watts sat down on a seat and looked really bored still? Anyone who's ever owned a TV will undoubtedly have had the fortune of witnessing that classic EastEnders gem from January 2005 when Den Watts stood up and walked outside! Then looked really bored. Despite having Miss Piggy for a daughter, and a junior Ian Botham for a son (fact!), Den clearly wasn't good enough for Chrissie Watts and her hard-arsed pals, and understandably he met his match with a dog-shaped doorstop and several hundred pounds of concrete mix.   Fear not, Dirty Den fans. We've been rooting around in the dustbins of all of EastEnders' executive producers. While the contents were mostly piles of faxes from the Broadcasters' Audience Research Board (6 million viewers! hilarious!), we stumbled across the following diagram that some wise nut had thought up. Clearly the ratings have hit them hard, so they've had to resort to bringing him back. What this diagram appears to depict is the biological breakdown of Dirty Den's current body and his eventual respawning as some kind of giant sunflower beast, a giant sunflower beast that will sprout legs and storm into Albert Square bearing little regard for the minions that run around in fear below. We think this is an excellent idea. We would be highly surprised if it didn't show up within the next 3 or 4 years, at least. Duh, duh, duh, duh duh, duh-duh-duh-duh...